How to help a child struggling with reading
“My child doesn’t read at all. Will he or she end up behind? How do I get my child to pick up a book and think independently? Why won’t they read? I used to read to my kids when they were little, but I never managed to get them to read by themselves. He loves comics and other ‘frivolous things,’ but doesn’t take to more serious books. My child reads absentmindedly, not understanding what they read.” Today, these are some of the most common reactions from parents.Advice:
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The issue of “mechanical,” meaningless reading was first studied by Americans, particularly psychologist and education specialist Michael Cole. He noticed that some children read as if their right brain hemisphere—responsible for imagination and emotion—was disconnected.
These days, all children are taught to read and write. The total amount of text they read may be similar to years past, but now it’s mostly digital: e-books, blogs, social media, rather than classic books or newspapers. This shift has changed the role of books. Today’s children aren’t less curious, but their curiosity is less channeled; instead of seeing your child with a book, you often see them at a computer or tablet.
To better understand our children, we need to become familiar not only with computers but also with e-books. Learn how to find reading apps, use digital libraries, and search for literature online. But while building reading skills and fostering a love of reading are related, they are not the same.
Let’s look at why children sometimes refuse to read:
- Some children lack shared reading experiences, where parents model excitement for stories and book characters.
- Children are sometimes pushed to read too early, before they’re able to discuss new stories or ideas with their parents. Parental ambitions might push for early reading, but creativity often develops through play, remaining childlike, asking questions, and solving problems creatively.
- Children actually read more than parents think, but not always the “serious” texts parents value. Parents may dismiss blogs or social media as less valuable than classic literature.
- Reading may not satisfy a child’s need for imagination as much as TV or the internet does today—life offers many more distractions than before.
- Parents and children may have very different ideals and interests, and the generational gap is wider than ever. Some say this is the first generation more influenced by its own experience than that of previous generations.
- Finally, insisting and pressuring children to read can create negative associations with books.
Remember, the essence of reading isn’t just the ability to understand and retain text, regardless of format, but truly cherishing the act of reading. If you wish for the soothing sound of turning pages, you need to foster that environment from your child’s earliest years.
- Surround children with books. Space constraints and digital media may reduce visible books in homes, but if a home contains no signs of a reading culture, children won’t see books as valuable. A home filled with cared-for books for every taste is where a love for reading can grow—even secretly.
- Read constantly. Share literature with children from infancy. Move from simple picture books to more complex works. Read at bedtime, during trips, and sometimes trade cartoons and games for books. Visit bookstores together. Let your child see you reading—nothing builds curiosity more than your example.
- Choose the right books. Don’t silently push books you think your child ‘should’ read. This often fails. Instead, read together what appeals to both of you, discuss the characters and plot. Children’s literature is constantly evolving, and it’s easy nowadays to exchange recommendations online.
- Encourage story-making. Write and invent stories with your child. Creating imaginary worlds nurtures creativity and fosters the desire to read thicker books later. Retelling old tales in new ways builds creative thinking, and children with vivid imaginations will seek out more complex stories in books.
- Explore poetry together. Poems are manageable text units for children to understand, remember, and retell. Kids who start using computers early may struggle to articulate ideas, but working with poetry, speaking, and engaging in role-play helps develop language and communication skills, not just silent reading.
- Stage performances based on stories. Children are fascinated by relationships and characters. Role-playing games based on familiar stories make reading an event, with dialogue and interaction—an important step in developing narrative skills.
When choosing books, remember that new children’s and teen books are just as good as classics and often better suited for modern kids who are used to visual media and fast-paced stories. Forcing your favorites on them risks extinguishing their interest. Respect your child’s preferences—even if they aren’t the same as yours. If your child reads something you don’t prefer and skips your favorite classics, that’s not a reason to criticize them.
Don’t discourage your child by lecturing about “spirituality” or their lack of literary understanding. Children should enjoy reading not just for its educational benefits, but for the unique joy it brings. If you want your child to read eagerly, nurture the pleasure in reading—not just through following tradition, but by meeting them where they are.