If your child is self harming, talking about suicide, or showing signs that deeply concern you, you do not have to figure this out alone. Get clear, parent-focused guidance on what to notice, how to respond, and what steps to take next based on your situation.
Share what is happening right now, including how urgent it feels, and we’ll help you think through the next steps, how to talk with your child, and when to seek immediate support.
Self-harm and suicidal thoughts in children and teens can look different from one family to another. Some parents notice cuts, burns, or hidden injuries. Others hear statements about wanting to disappear, not wanting to be here, or feeling hopeless. You may also be seeing withdrawal, intense mood changes, secrecy, or a sudden drop in functioning. This page is designed for parents looking for help with teen self harm and suicidal thoughts, child self harm and suicidal thoughts, and what to do if a child is self harming and suicidal. The goal is to help you respond calmly, take warning signs seriously, and choose the next step with more confidence.
Unexplained cuts, scratches, burns, bruises, long sleeves in warm weather, hiding sharp objects, or spending long periods alone in the bathroom or bedroom can all be warning signs.
Listen for hopelessness, self-hatred, talk about being a burden, saying others would be better off without them, or comments about death, disappearing, or suicide.
Pulling away from friends, loss of interest, sleep changes, school problems, agitation, giving away belongings, or a sudden shift from distress to unusual calm can signal increased risk.
If you are worried, ask in a calm and direct way whether your child is hurting themselves or thinking about suicide. Asking does not put the idea in their head. It helps you understand the level of risk.
If there is concern about self-harm or suicide, secure medications, sharp objects, ropes, cords, firearms, and other means. Increased supervision may be needed depending on urgency.
If there is immediate danger, active suicidal talk, a plan, recent self-harm, or you cannot keep your child safe, seek emergency help right away. For non-immediate but serious concerns, contact a pediatrician, therapist, crisis resource, or local mental health provider as soon as possible.
Try: “I’ve noticed you seem overwhelmed, and I’m really glad you’re here with me. I want to understand what’s been going on.” A steady tone can make it easier for your child to open up.
Try: “Sometimes when kids feel this bad, they may hurt themselves or think about suicide. Has that been happening for you?” Clear questions are more helpful than vague hints.
Avoid reacting with anger, threats, or lectures. Let your child know their safety comes first and that you will work together to get support, even if the conversation feels hard.
If your child is in immediate danger, has active suicidal talk, has a plan, has taken steps to harm themselves, or you do not feel you can keep them safe, seek emergency help right away. Stay with your child, reduce access to dangerous items, and contact emergency services or a crisis resource in your area.
Not always. Some children or teens self-harm without wanting to die, while others may have suicidal thoughts with or without self-harm. Even when self-harm is not described as suicidal, it should still be taken seriously because risk can change over time.
If your child is self harming, talking about suicide, expressing hopelessness, hiding injuries, or showing major emotional or behavioral changes, professional support is appropriate. You do not need to wait until things feel extreme to reach out.
Stay calm, keep the door open, and continue checking in. Let them know you are concerned about safety, not trying to punish them. Even if they resist talking, you can still contact a pediatrician, therapist, school counselor, or crisis resource for guidance on next steps.
Answer a few questions to get a focused assessment for self-harm and suicidal thoughts, including how urgent the situation may be, how to talk with your child, and what kind of support to consider next.
Answer a Few QuestionsExplore more assessments in this topic group.
See related assessments across this category.
Find more parenting assessments by category and topic.
Suicidal Thoughts
Suicidal Thoughts
Suicidal Thoughts
Suicidal Thoughts